TRIGGER WARNING

Gonna cut right to the chase on this one. The elephant in the room.

If you feel like things are just never going to get better, and you feel the only solution is to end it all, please don’t.

Most of us have been there. And I’m here to tell you that no matter how bad it gets, despite what you may believe in the moment about yourself. it will get better.

If you decide to go forward with it in a weak moment, you will forever hurt those who care about you. You may even ruin their lives. They will never be the same. Your parents, siblings, kids, best friends - they will never recover.

Let’s say you are on the verge of losing your job, your house, or your marriage, or all 3 are going to happen at the same time. It’s better for your kids to know that you are still alive than to know that your time on earth is over, due to your own choice. You can fall back on resources that can get you back on your feet. If friends and family have their own resources to help you, all the better. Sometimes, despair and hopelessness seem like a black iron curtain that hangs in front of you for what seems like forever. But that’s just the demons in our heads talking to us. What you focus on expands. It is possible for those demons to fuck the fuck off.

If at your service, all the attendees are crying and too fucked up to eulogize you, your service will have been in vain. If you have young children who can’t sit still and are asking why mom or dad is laying there and won’t get up to chase you around, how will that impact everyone else in attendance? Imagine someone else having to chase your toddler around because they don’t understand what happened, and they want to do what toddlers do - run around. I can’t imagine trying to contain a toddler while sobbing over the passing of a loved one due to their own hand.

On the other side of the coin, if your parents are in their older years, how will that impact whatever number of days they have left? You will leave them with a nuclear scar they will forever be fucked up by.

So please, if it all seems hopeless, call or text 988. Even if you’re gone, you will leave a neverending trail of destruction, almost if it were made out of ionizing radiation and nuclear isotopes where (much like nuclear fallout) the pain dissipates in 100,000 years, and last I checked, we don’t live that long.

I don’t normally ask you to share any of these posts, but please feel free to share this. If this gives you perspective that you didn’t have before, it’s likely whomever you share this with will also see it as a new perspective.

Thank you and stay safe out there.