Thank You Motherfuckers For Subscribing.

Hello and thank you all for subscribing. I hope to fail miserably at the following with this newsletter:

1. Have this be your typical mamby-pamby milquetoast bullshit greeting card type of gratitude. I aim to make this the type of gratitude that comes with habañero sauce for dipping. And some Jack Daniels to wash it down with.

2. Be boring as hell. I don’t do boring.

3. Be long and drawn out. I actually do long and drawn out, but out of respect for the audience, you’re probably sucking down your coffee while reading this in the morning before you head out for your share of world domination. You ain’t got time for long and drawn out.

4. Be vulgar just to be vulgar. That should go without saying.

5. Be godly. This is more in line with Black Sabbath than the actual religious Sabbath. I won’t disparage your religion, but it's gonna have to be checked at the door. And also, if it helps you mend, then I won’t stop you.

Thank you to my wife and my son. Without them I am less than nothing. A black hole. And thank you to all who motivated me to get off my ass and come up with this. You know who you are. Let’s see how big this gets. And if you’re not down with that, I got two words for you.